DATE: 5th January 2008
PLACE : Cybercafe Seksyen 7, Shah Alam
TIME : 8.00 PM

                     I knew this chick will gave her phone number since All I do is keep on praising her about how beautiful she is just by looking at her profile picture at her Myspace account.. Almost a month now I had to go to CC just for leaving her a text saying I miss her or cant stop thinking about her...
                     Well, now that I have her personal number, and she did asked me to call her later that night..... I'm crossing my fingers hoping that she's still available and not belonging to someone else's.... But hey, she did gave me her number, right..??? early signs for me that she's still single.... And my brain is at LALA land now......
                      And yes, not only the brain but my thoughts, my feelings, even my guts is all about her for weeks and weeks and this is so suffering and this shall end if  I can only meet her and express my feelings towards her myself instead of typing it in those social media thing...  And I guess I shall do it then.... So, here goes... dialling her number now... Bismillah......

HIDUP DALAM MATI

His love for her he thought was strong,
Her love for him was truly wrong.

It was never love and always lust,
It lacked all good things, even trust.

She broke his heart a thousand times,
Then proceeded to break his mind.

When she was done she left him there,
And when he cried she didn’t care.

But time has passed and he realized,
The pain he felt has minimized.

Resentment lies on some bad days,
But memories fade into a haze. 

He’s better now that much is true,
He’s better now because of you....

18/02/2017 

                                                                         POEM BY ,

                                                                                            -SARA-

                                                                                       

HIDUP DALAM MATI

RESOLUTION OR CHANGES...??? YOU DECIDE...!!!

Too late for the other side,
Caught in a chase,
25 to life....

Too late,
 I can't keep chasing em,
I'm taking my life back....
Caught in a chase,
25 to life....

I don't think she understands the sacrifices that I made...
Maybe if this bitch had acted right I would've stayed...
But I've already wasted over half of my life I would've laid...
Down and died for you, I no longer cry for you...
No more pain, bitch...!!
You took me for granted, took my heart and ran it straight into the planet....
Into the dirt I can no longer stand it...
Now my respect I demand it...
Im gonna take control of this relationship...
Command it, and im gonna be the boss of you now, goddamnit...!!!
And what I mean is that I will no longer let you control me...
So you better hear me out this much you owe me...
I gave up my life for you, totally devoted to you,
While I've stayed faithful all the way,
this is how I fucking get repaid..???
Look at how I dress fucking Mastrum sweats, go to work a mess,
Always in a rush to get back to you, I ain't heard you yet....
Not even once say you appreciate me, I deserve respect...
I've done my best to give you nothing less than perfectness....
And I know that if I end this I'll no longer have nothing left.....
But you keep treating me like a staircase,
So it's time to fucking step.....!!
And I wont be coming back so don't hold your fucking breath....!!
You know what you've done no need to go in depth.....!!
I told you, you'd be sorry if I fucking left.....!!
I'd laugh while you wept....!!!
Hows it feel now, yeah,..!!!
 Funny ain't it,.??
 You neglected me...!!!
Did me a favor although my spirit free you've set...
But a special place for you in my heart I have kept...
It's unfortunate but it's,

Too late for the other side,
Caught in a chase,
25 to life....

I feel like when I bend over backwards for you all you do is laugh....
Cause that ain't good enough you expect me to fold myself in half....
Til I snap,
Don't think I'm loyal...
All I do is Chant for you and kick ass...
How can I moonlight on the side,
I have no life outside of that....
Don't I give you enough of my time..???
You don't think so, do you...?
Jealous when I spend time with the girls,
Why I'm married to you still man... I don't know...
But tonight I'm serving you with papers,
I'm divorcing you...
Go marry someone else and make em famous....
And take away their freedom like you did to me....
Treat em like you don't need them and they ain't worthy of you....
Feed em the same shit that you made me eat...
I'm moving on, forget you oh,
Now I'm 'FUCKING special....?
 I didn't feel special when I was with you...
All I ever felt was this,
Helplessness...
Imprisoned by a selfish bitch...!!!
Chew me up and spit me out...!!!
I fell for this so many times...
It's ridiculous,
And still I stick with this...!!!
I'm sick of this but in my sickness and addiction,
You're addictive as they get...!!!
Evil as they come, vindictive as they make em..
My friends keep asking me why I can't just walk away from it...!!!
I'm addicted...!!!
To the pain, the stress, the drama, the sweats..!!!!
I'm drawn in so I guess I'm gonna mess,
Cursed and blessed....!!!
But this time I'm going to,
Ain't changing my mind...!!!
I'm climbing out this abyss,
You screaming as I walk out that I'll be missed...!!!
But when you spoke of people who meant the most to you,
You left me off your list...!!!

Fuck You FOOTBALL....
I'm leaving you...
 my life sentence is served, bitch...!!!
And it's just,

Too late for the other side,
Caught in a chase,
25 to life....

 I'm gone, man....!!!
Too late for the other side,
Caught in a chase,
25 to life....

Too late...
Caught in a chase,
25 to life...

Fais & Afrojack - Used To Have It All (Official Video)

Yup.... Used to have it all...!!!! But then again,, people do change sometimes....!!!!

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